Addicted to Unhappiness: How Hidden Motives for
  • Paperback
  • 197 pages
  • Addicted to Unhappiness: How Hidden Motives for Unhappiness Keep You from Creating the Life You Truly Want, And What You Can Do
  • Martha Heineman Pieper
  • English
  • 16 October 2017
  • 1733089705

Addicted to Unhappiness: How Hidden Motives for Unhappiness Keep You from Creating the Life You Truly Want, And What You Can Do[Reading] ➷ Addicted to Unhappiness: How Hidden Motives for Unhappiness Keep You from Creating the Life You Truly Want, And What You Can Do Author Martha Heineman Pieper – Essayreview.co.uk Are you unable to follow through on important resolutions Are you frustrated or inefficient at work Is your love life unrewarding or filled with conflict Are you plagued by unpleasant emotions for no Are you unable Unhappiness: How MOBI ï to follow through on important resolutions Are you frustrated or inefficient at work Is your love life unrewarding or filled with conflict Are you plagued by unpleasant emotions for no apparent reason Everyone is born with the potential to live fulfilled lives, but many Addicted to PDF \ of us find it difficult to realize that potential Best selling authors Martha and William Pieper will help you understand how you unknowingly became an addict to unhappiness Using real life examples drawn from their clinical experience, the authors provide insights and effective strategies that will help you to Unhappiness: How PDF/EPUB ã choose and maintain the happiness you deserveNNING TIME hrs and minsMartha Heineman Pieper, PhD PMartha Heineman Pieper, PhD.


About the Author: Martha Heineman Pieper

Smart Love Press Unhappiness: How MOBI ï has just published the second edition of Addicted to Unhappiness How Hidden Motives for Unhappiness Keep You from Creating the Life You Truly Want, And What You Can Do Carol Gilligan said, To me, the thesis was riveting and instantly applicable I see it Addicted to PDF \ all around me Smart Love Press published my second children s book, Jilly s Terrible Temper Tantrums And How She Outgrew Them in The first was the award winning Mommy, Daddy, I Had a Bad Dream which won thirteen awards including the IBPA Ben Franklin Award for to Unhappiness: How PDF/EPUB ã best children s picture book of Jilly s Terrible Temper Tantrums has won the Mom s Choice Gold Award, first place Storymonsters award, NAPPA Award, a Book Excellence Award and a Feathered Quill Award Five stars I absolutely love this book from both a teaching perspective as well as helping parents useeffective discipline strategies M Bartmess, Preschool Teacher Very highly recommended Midwest Book Review This is a delightful book to guide our children through theirfrustrations We especially like themessage that Jilly s parents will always love her, even in the midst of a tempertantrum NAPPA Director Elena Epstein This book can work as an aid to talking to children about temper tantrums and helping build dialogue and communication to help work through the emotions that cause the melt downs in the first place Mrs Mommy BooknerdFeathered Quill Judge I love the lesson taught here, and wish all parents would take this to heart I wish you much luck on spreading the Loving Regulation and Smart Love Concept to everyone around the globe I am the co author with William J Pieper, MD of the bestselling parenting book Smart Love The Comprehensive Guide to Understanding, Regulating, and Enjoying Your Child reprinted by Smart Love Press, smartlovepress We also co authored the popular adult self help book, Addicted to Unhappiness McGraw Hill, and for ten years wrote a parenting column, Smart Love, in Chicago Parent I received my PhD from the University of Chicago and my BA from Radcliffe College Smart Love is the basis for Smart Love Family Services which provides a broad spectrum of services to children and families, including counseling services, parent education, toddler programs, and a preschool In addition to my own psychotherapy practice, I am the consultant to both the Smart Love Clinic and the Natalie G Heineman Smart Love Preschool Toddler Explorations.


10 thoughts on “Addicted to Unhappiness: How Hidden Motives for Unhappiness Keep You from Creating the Life You Truly Want, And What You Can Do

  1. says:

    Someone recommended this book to me, so I was a little surprised that I got so little out of it Perhaps I didn t find much value in it because I am not addicted to unhappiness, so I could not relate to what the author was talking about.This book seems to say that people whose life circumstances are good are only unhappy because they have some unconscious desire to make themselves unhappy This unconscious desire is something that comes from a confusion between happiness and unhappiness that d Someone recommended this book to me, so I was a little surprised that I got so little out of it Perhaps I didn t find much value in it because I am not addicted to unhappiness, so I could not relate to what the author was talking about.This book seems to say that people whose life circumstances are good are only unhappy because they have some unconscious desire to make themselves unhappy This unconscious desire is something that comes from a confusion between happiness and unhappiness that dates back to childhood According to this book, a lot of people had unhappy feelings as a child that were the result of bad parenting But since we believe that our parents love us and are perfect, we also strive to continue to have those unhappy feelings that we had as a child As a result, as adults we sabotage our opportunities to be happy.I think this is probably true, but this seems like such a simplistic and watered down explanation of human psychology that it is not all that worthwhile The book does provide a ton of examples, so there may be some value in the examples, if you think the authors correctly analyzed what was going on with their patients But I think a better word for what the authors are talking about is a neurotic complex or the concept of toxic shame that is explained in books by Pia Mellody and John Bradshaw.This book makes it sound like it s obvious what people need to do to be happy, and the only reason people are unhappy is that they are not choosing to do these things But different people find happiness in different ways, and for many people, I don t think it s obvious at all what they should be doing.I will say this though There do seem to be a lot of people who appear to spend all of their waking hours complaining, without any obvious justification It does seem like there are quite a few people who would be absolutely miserable if they had nothing to complain about So I guess those are the type of people that this book is about

  2. says:

    Builds on attachment theory The harder work on figuring out your emotional makeup is better done wrangling other,intense books for me, Anthony Storr s Solitude and Jonathan Heidt s Happiness Hypothesis to reach the kind of objectivity needed to do what this book suggests Still, several sensible insights It works after you don t need it so badly.

  3. says:

    The authors are claiming that we can be addicted to unhappiness in the sense that we need it in our lives The idea is really not that crazy because in built into us is the pursuit of happiness As a child unfortunately through inappropriate discipline for appropriately aged behaviour and values we associate our feelings of unhappiness with what makes our parents and authority figures happy Children being mirrors or imitators simply take it in Thus our happiness can be not only linked to appro The authors are claiming that we can be addicted to unhappiness in the sense that we need it in our lives The idea is really not that crazy because in built into us is the pursuit of happiness As a child unfortunately through inappropriate discipline for appropriately aged behaviour and values we associate our feelings of unhappiness with what makes our parents and authority figures happy Children being mirrors or imitators simply take it in Thus our happiness can be not only linked to appropriate things but also things that make us unhappy In fact we hang on to painful things, memories and feelings, simply because they are familiar and give us supposed comfort.This book is not any old self help book but rooted in research and years of practical experiences I found the book really quite helpful

  4. says:

    I very much appreciated what I learned from this book, and that I need to examine my life for areas where I am satisfied with being unhappy I ve come to live with things that are very wrong but I don t do anything to address them because I accept them as normal Unfortunately, the solutions to solving these issues always involve intentional, focused hard work There are no shortcuts But realizing there is a problem is the first step, and always leads to some improvement So that s the good ne I very much appreciated what I learned from this book, and that I need to examine my life for areas where I am satisfied with being unhappy I ve come to live with things that are very wrong but I don t do anything to address them because I accept them as normal Unfortunately, the solutions to solving these issues always involve intentional, focused hard work There are no shortcuts But realizing there is a problem is the first step, and always leads to some improvement So that s the good news

  5. says:

    I m not sure I unreservedly buy into the central thesis, which is that when children aren t treated optimally they mistake the resulting negative feelings for happiness because, to their minds, it s what their perfect parents intend for them to feel and must thus be an ideal state According to this theory, adults then end up addicted to the unhappiness they felt as children and consistently act in ways that sabotage their true happiness to bring themselves back to a state of unhappiness wh I m not sure I unreservedly buy into the central thesis, which is that when children aren t treated optimally they mistake the resulting negative feelings for happiness because, to their minds, it s what their perfect parents intend for them to feel and must thus be an ideal state According to this theory, adults then end up addicted to the unhappiness they felt as children and consistently act in ways that sabotage their true happiness to bring themselves back to a state of unhappiness which, to their unconscious minds, equals happiness because it s the state they experienced as small children with their parents.Anyway It s an intriguing theory even if I felt like there was a certain degree of oversimplification it is a layperson directed self help book, after all It certainly does make sense in a way, and whether or not it s literally true I don t see how such a subjective theory could be declared definitely true or untrue anyway , it seems like it could be a very helpful and productive way for people to look at stubborn behavior patterns and vague, chronic dissatisfaction with life At the very least, I think it s a useful thought experiment

  6. says:

    Although I agree that people can make a habit out of being unhappy and thinking negative thoughts, I am not sure I buy into the fact that the unhappiness we experience now is because of childhood experiences and the past relationships with our parents Or at least not to the extent the author believes.

  7. says:

    I had never thought of any of this before I do not believe this is completely true for all people But, I do think it has relevance in most people s lives If nothing else, it is very informative on what others think I voluntarily read and reviewed this book in exchange for a free copy.

  8. says:

    Al principio un poco amargo como me gustan , me hizo reflexionar sobre mi conducta y la de los dem s es un gran apoyo para mi profesi n

  9. says:

    An Interesting Premise Explored with Depth and BreadthI enjoy nonfiction, and therefore, I read a lot of it In these days where self publishing is such a boon, allowing authors who would never have been published by a traditional house to sell their own books, too often nonfiction books are seemingly slapped together from a variety of web sources rather than coming from the author s personal experience or expertise So I was delighted to find this book to be one of greater depth and breadth tha An Interesting Premise Explored with Depth and BreadthI enjoy nonfiction, and therefore, I read a lot of it In these days where self publishing is such a boon, allowing authors who would never have been published by a traditional house to sell their own books, too often nonfiction books are seemingly slapped together from a variety of web sources rather than coming from the author s personal experience or expertise So I was delighted to find this book to be one of greater depth and breadth than I typically see The premise of the book is that our unhappiness, which manifests in a variety of ways from depression to excess weight, stems from the way we were parented, and that we have accepted a certain reality based on this unconsciously It is this invisible aspect that makes the cycle hard to break The book is split into two parts, first exploring how this paradigm is set up and then looking at how you can break the pattern I don t necessarily buy that this affects everyone, though it may to greater and lesser degrees I really liked that this got me thinking about my own background If you re tired of self help books that don t seem to have much substance and you want to attempt to get to the core of any unhappiness that you may have, you may find this book to be of help.I received a free copy of this book, but that did not affect my review.My book blog

  10. says:

    Fascinating book so far Has some really good advice not only for raising children, but also pertains to problems that adults have that may have manifested as a result of things that happened in their childhood We all know parents are not perfect, but it is important to analyze our behaviors, examining the past closely so that we can better understand ourselves and our loved ones around us With a better understanding of the role that discipline, love and parenting that our parents gave us, we Fascinating book so far Has some really good advice not only for raising children, but also pertains to problems that adults have that may have manifested as a result of things that happened in their childhood We all know parents are not perfect, but it is important to analyze our behaviors, examining the past closely so that we can better understand ourselves and our loved ones around us With a better understanding of the role that discipline, love and parenting that our parents gave us, we can see our behaviors in aobjective way and try to better ourselves for future generations The book is based on years of research However, it is a relatively easy and fast read because of all of the examples that the authors use to illustrate their points So far, it s a good and very informative read

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